In Review

by: Sarah Dispair

Hanzel und Gretyl/Bella Morte

Saturday November 4, 2006

Jaxx Niteclub in Springfield, VA

            Stage diving, fake German accents and plenty of Jegermeister shots passed around on stage were all a part of the Hanzel und Gretyl/Bella Morte show at Jaxx Nightclub in Springfield, VA.  This show was the last leg of the tour, which Jegermeister so kindly sponsored.  Novelty plastic shot glasses with the Hanzel und Gretyl logo printed on them were given out for free.  In typical Jaxx fashion, the doors opened late and the band set up put the show time back even later.  Word of advice to those attending shows at Jaxx, you can arrive late, and still know that you didn’t miss any thing.

            For those that arrived early, you were treated to the incessant sounds of an applicably named band called The Groaning.  Looking like the reject member of the Fleetwood Mac roadies, this ensemble of non-conventional rockers made for something worth really groaning about.  Consisting of 6 members who are well past their rocking prime, they incorporate flute and fiddle into their whiny goth music.  The fact that they are headed by a female vocalist left you with false hopes for ambient vocals, but once again, you are let down.  The lead singer was so plowed over drunk, that her warbling made you wish they sold noise-canceling headphones instead of earplugs.  With no stage presence, no energy, and little appeal to the audience, it made you wonder who decided this would be a good idea to book this band.  And to top off their painfully long set, there were shameless plugs pleading the audience to buy their new EP (which had not even been released at the time!), the lead singer drunkenly attempted to get the show attendees to go to Club Midnight afterwards and mistakenly called DJ Liebchin by DJ Faye’s name.  A perfect wrap up to a perfect set.

            The next band up was Dreams in Fear.  Depending on how much you had to drink at the time would influence your argument as to whether the singer was a woman or not.  I was stone sober and had trouble telling the difference.  Even funnier was the fact that the place turned into Lilith Faire as soon as they started playing.  I was hoping that with all the testosterone pumping in the chick onstage that we would get some good brutal music.  However, to my disappointment she fell flat and the music just sucked.  There was ample female power going, so I didn’t want to complain about the music for fear of getting my ass kicked.

            Finally Bella Morte set up and started playing.  Local to the Virginia area, they were right at home in Jaxx Nightclub.  You can usually catch them there at least once a year with another big act.  (See, good things do come from Virginia).  If you have never seen Bella Morte play before, then you would not understand the extent that these guys like to joke around on stage.  Every one in the band carried an enthusiasm and humor that energized the audience.  Thanks to the crowd press in, I made it up to the front rail to catch a close up performance.  The singer jumped around on stage and crooned at the girls in the crowd.  He climbed out into the crowd to sing to everyone and was mauled by all the girls within a 5 foot radius.  Kaiser Von Loopy from Hanzel and Gretyl came out and started throwing shot glasses with the singer from Bella Morte’s phone number on them.  All the band members were having fun and playing amazing music at the same time.

            After their set, Hanzel and Gretyl came on and proceeded to blow away the crowd with another amazing set.  The raw power of Vas Kallas’s voice is enough to peel the paint off the crusty walls of the club.  German sounding music was set to Marching style announcements about random nonsense were placed between song groupings.  These were followed up by a shot of Jegermeister in honor of the sponsoring.  Before the set came to a close, the singer and guitarist from Bella Morte came out on stage mid song in jus their underwear with two signs that read “poo poo”.  The then stage dove into the crowd, furthering the hilarious frenzy that the show was becoming.   At the end of the set, all of the members of Bella Morte joined H&G on stage and then invited the rest of the audience up to sing the final song.